May Set to Reject Day Off Ill

She’s definitely not ill. That red tinged bulge throbbing away at the base of her neck is in no way a sign of weakness. The fact that she keeps needing to whip out a neatly tailored hankie to honk into every now and then is not at all an indication that she’s in the grips of a bout of something nasty.

The lady’s not one for emitting copious amounts of sticky bodily fluids (oh god, this is taking a turn I really wasn’t intending. No one in their right mind wants to think about that sort of thing when it comes to their politicians. They have to remain stolidly asexual. Most of them anyway, not naming any names of course) anyway. She’s never even heard of the term livid mucus.

So when you step forward, just on a thoroughly compassionate impulse mind, and suggest that the Prime Minister takes a day or two to recuperate from the vile cold she clearly has know that you are taking your life in your hands. Women cannot show weakness in this arena. Hillary takes a few days off the campaign trail with pneumonia and look at that, she’s definitely not president (that was absolutely the deciding factor. The whole email thing was a smokescreen, everyone else indulges in that sort of thing – Mike Pence for a glorious example – so it was more down to the fact that the public didn’t want to have to contemplate what a lady might look like on her sickbed when she’s supposed to be running a nation.

Now, be a dear and nip to the shops. For a few cold remedies, that sort of thing. Simply as a preventative measure of course. Wouldn’t want to give anyone the wrong impression. Oh, and turn off the lights on your way out, Theresa’s just going to have a little lie down with a cold wet flannel on her head. It’s helps thinking up visionary directions to take the country in.


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