How To… Talk to the Animals

I make it a general rule in life to say hello to pretty much every dog I meet. Maybe you’re different, you might feel it more important to ingratiate yourself with cats or your heart might lift with uncontained joy the moment you see a wild bunny or whenever you encounter a really nifty lizard. Or perhaps you have no joy in your soul and eschew all contact with animals wherever possible. If that’s the case then you definitely need to start having conversations with the critters.

There’s a particular tone that automatically gets adopted. A variant of baby talk. So do bear that in mind as you prepare your icebreaker. You may well be under a slight misapprehension that it doesn’t completely matter what you choose to converse about because they’re only dumb animals who couldn’t possibly hope to understand you. Well, maybe you’re the one who’s dumb and people take plenty of, apparently undue, care to keep you included in the general discourse.

Therefore, it is of clear and real importance to select subjects to keep the animals engaged with what you have to say. This might well be something that they have previously expressed an interest in such as small fluffy things they may want to devour or areas with prime snuffling potential. Or you could get them into the loop on subject matter they’ll find of value.

At the end of the day, conversation with anyone can turn into practically anything. You have to walk in with an open mind but also have done appropriateĀ preparation. Then again, you shouldn’t have to do all the work, they really have to put in their share in proceedings, meet you at the very least halfway. Unless, for some strange reason, you’re barking up the wrong tree. But that would be sheer madness.

Talk with the animals – Sammy Davis Jr.


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