How To… Set Fire to the Hive

So let’s kick things off with a brief yet thoroughly emphatic disclaimer. Do not, ever, set fire to any actual factual hives. Bees are brilliant, vital when it comes to our lamentably fragile environment and sufficiently scary that I’m extremely loathe to piss them off in any way whatsoever. But leave the bees alone because they’re having problems and we can’t do without them. Plus, I’m sure as anything not living through my own personal nightmare of that is the Hated in the Nation episode of Black Mirror.

Well then, if we’re very definitely not combusting any insect infested structures how are we going to be able to claim that we’ve been setting fire to a hive? Alright, I totally had a direction to take this in when I started but that was so long ago (damn the internet for being so distracting, things took a turn and then some. Plus, I had to go and help with a thing and then a fuse blew and my teeny tiny fevered mind just couldn’t cope with the excitement of it all).

Fine, remember back when I was talking about getting along with your boss all that time ago (sure, it was yesterday but we’ve had an insane momentous inauguration since then and I’ve changed my mind about a few things)? There will become moments when you simply can’t bring yourself to get along with that cretin for the pure and simple reason that they hold some variety of power over you.

Burn it down. Wreathe that wretched queen bee with flames and incinerate that sucker so that you’ll never have to return. Again, we’re speaking in purely non literal terms because if you go ahead and begin dabbling in arson then I swear that I’ll have absolutely nothing more to do with you.

Set fire to the hive – Karnivool

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