Big Bad Sunny Astronaut

In a world supposedly striving for inclusivity it’s increasingly difficult to find ways to make yourself feel superior. No longer is it kosher to block women from golf clubs and similarly previously exclusively male spaces (apart from, you know, the presidency of the United States but baby steps folks. We’re only allowed to accomplish one great leap forward at a time). You’re simply not supposed to preferentially select based on race or creed or background.

How can you legitimately and definitively claim the high ground in every given situation? Well, you can stop rambling like an incoherent maniac for a start, people are beginning to stare and wonder, occasionally out loud, what argument you’ve been trying to drive home for what seems like ages past. Essentially, the answer to the question you never asked is to become an astronaut. No one really and truly in their heart of hearts considers themselves to be more impressive than a spacewalker (and that’s absolutely the new title they should adopt).

I know what you’re thinking. The transition from whatever you’re doing at the moment to titan of the sky above the atmosphere is just too damn simple and downright easy. You’ll need a loftier ambition to make completely sure that your larger goal is realised. Become the big badass of space. Flaunt your outrageous courageous persona until the rest of the galaxy going crew has no choice but to bow down to your brilliance.

But also, you should be cheerful as you go about this. Positivity will have a thoroughly excellent impact on your brand. It’s all well and good to live it large and have everyone be afraid of you but it’s another matter entirely to manage it with a great big smile on your face. Now go tread all over the moon. Or Venus. Whatever.

Song choices courtesy of: Kodaline, Thomas Newman and Coco and the Butterfields

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