2 in 3 Chickens to Win Back Business

So clearly what you should be taking away from this news item is that a third of all chickens are utter layabouts who just can’t be bothered to take action. Or that they’re too afraid to muck about with the status quo governing their lives. Bear in mind that it’s very easy to rest on your laurels, taking advantage of the privilege you probably don’t even know you have, in order to maintain things just the way they are. Because it’s easier.

However, we can take comfort in the fact that the majority of the poultry population is standing firm. They’re ready to ring in the new and get business back into the coop, where it truly belongs. If you think that this is some sort of joke then you really ought to understand that we’re living in a post-truth world (not a fan of that term but buzz words get you traction) and that the craziest stories are all definitely gold plated fact.

It all started with negotiating a better price for their own produce. The farmers couldn’t be trusted to get anything resembling a fair deal so an enterprising fowl stepped into the fray. From there it was readily apparent that the avian contingent simply couldn’t fail. They had a far better nose for success. One of them’s even considering making a play for the Apprentice.

So before long the chickens will be in control of our boardrooms and it’ll be a surprisingly good thing for our economy. The projections are looking far more excellent that you might have expected and with our feathered friends at the helm we’re on track to lower inflation by quite a way. It’s worth having a think about industries that are likely to boom thanks to this alteration in leadership. Very small ties for instance, and business suits cut to suit a certain chickeny figure.

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