May: No Fear Over Brexit Pledges

What, did you actually pay attention to any of the claims they made throughout the entire duration of the leave campaign? Surely you realised it was tantamount to steaming piles of bull effluence streaming out of their respective mouths of the politicians who decided that winning was worth it no matter the cost. Or they slightly overestimated their influence, underestimated the country’s frustration and figured they might as well have a laugh with whatever outlandish nonsense popped into their entitled skulls.

More money for the NHS? Absolutely. Because the EU is nothing more than a bottomless money pit into which we’ve been chucking frivolous and downright irresponsible sums for next to no material benefit. Keep those foreign chaps away with no consequences whatsoever? No problem mate. Tell you what, we’ll train the children up as veritable grease monkeys so that you won’t have to pay over the odds to get your bog unclogged.

So, entirely understandably, Theresa May, our glorious undisputable leader, refuses to touch the various promises made with a bargepole. There’s no way she can conjure an extra hundred million or so a week to funnel into the NHS. That would be sheer and utter madness don’t you know? To the pledges fabricated by Johnson and those of his ilk in the heady days of early 2016 she says, no fear.

Don’t worry your pretty little heads about it though people who voted leave and inexplicably haven’t come to regret the decision. We will be ploughing forward with extrication from the continent we’re still very much a part of geographically if nothing else. We shall stand alone, strong and shining against whatever the rest of the world might have to throw at us. Or distract ourselves with the fluffy delight of Bake Off for several weeks to come. After that might come the blind panic of those who don’t know what to do with the rest of their lives.

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