If the mere thought of a virgin sheet of bubble wrap lying there all inviting and whatnot doesn’t get you all tingly and excited then there’s something deeply wrong going down. It might be that events of a serious nature have overtaken your life at this moment in time so that something so delightful and innocent as an afternoon spent popping packaging protection seems utterly frivolous. Either that or there’s something dead deep down inside you suddenly making itself known.
Why would anyone ever not get an incredible thrill out such a demonstration of the godlike power of destruction? And it makes such a fun noise. Seriously, if a bad day has happened to come your way for whatever flavour or reason then go and get yourself a hearty sheet of bubble wrap and see if you can’t make it all that much better. Of course if such behaviour happens to lead you into a fetish then I will be held in no way responsible. But, you know, whatever floats your boat.
As you grow up, the magic burstable material starts taking on all sorts of unfortunate connotations. It ensconces valuable payloads, it would be an egregious calamity if it were to fail and your bits of precious would be damaged, possible even beyond all hope of repair. Bubble wrap rears its surprisingly unwelcome head every time you have to move house.
So take just a little bit of time to rediscover the joy. You can take a moment before breathing a sigh of relief that you can at long last pack it away. If you’re reluctant to surrender your carefully cultivated adulthood you can always indulge in a big fat glass of wine while you do so but crack out that bubble wrap and squish it to your heart’s content.
Song choices courtesy of: Flogging Molly, MIKA, Frank Turner and Thomas Newman