UK’s Covert Fight Against Pension Surge

It’s nothing personal. No matter how it might feel or seem, this isn’t a targeted attack versus a very specific demographic. The government simply doesn’t want anyone out there to have any money whatsoever and the greedy grabbing post-workers (not to be confused with those employed by the postal service, they were de-moneyed quite some time ago) were simply next on the list. You can hardly argue that it’s not their turn based on what’s happened before to students, those at the lower end of the pay scale and the dirty evil doctors.

However, not to stereotype or anything so appalling, the old have little to do with their days apart from toddling down to the polling station whenever the time is right to cast their ballot. This will naturally mean that a large proportion of politicians’ behaviour is dictated by a driving urge to keep the wrinklies subscribed to their personal agenda.

This is why this particular fight has to be on the down low. If the pensioners got wind of what was going on their votes would be lost for evermore and the big cheeses atop the political pyramid would be relegated to such degrading actions of canvassing students and their like. Sadly though it’s either these measures or another terrible round of legislation will be plucked from the absolutely not remotely lucky dip.

Come on then, you fancy yourself rather savvy and able to make the tough calls when they need to be made. What would you go for? Sterilise a random half of the breeding population in order to bring numbers down? Torch the educational institutions with demonstrably thick children? Outlaw hospitals in general and force people to wander about diseased or stumpy just trying to find a decent place to die? These are essentially the only options open to us to bring down that damn deficit.


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