Sharks Who Split Over Brexit

Everyone has an opinion. When it doesn’t directly affect them, they have no stake in the matter and it’s a field in which they have precisely zero expertise, they suddenly have so very many things to say. Healthcare professionals are standing up for the rights to the odd evening off that they feel entitled to and plenty of other folk are commenting on the wrongness of this from the comfort of their armchairs.

Now aquatic life is beginning to weigh in on the state of our bureaucratic relationships in Europe. It all started, not unlike the film Finding Nemo, with a really mouthy sardine (it might have been a few years since I’ve had the opportunity to view that particular animated cinematic treat). In amongst its busy schedule of swimming and avoiding those who might want to grill them and place them atop a slice of freshly toasted bread as a snack, the hapless fish came upon a certain piece of literature.

It was a decidedly unostentatious leaflet reasonably stating arguments for remaining shackled to the rest of the trading bloc. Naturally, sardines aren’t the most advanced of readers and just a few of the messages contained therein got ever so slightly lost in transit. That’s how the lies and mildly sensationalist claims were spread among the regular and cartilaginous fish populations.

I don’t think you’ll be particularly surprised to hear that the sharks in particular were scandalised by the garbled proceedings once they learned of them. Some were delighted that the two leggers were so divided. Soon their world would fall into chaos and the seas would take them as in the prophecies of old and at long last they would feast. Others became concerned that the increase in regulations that would no doubt come as part and parcel of an exit would have unforeseen impact on the fishing industry. Who’s to say who might be proven correct?


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