Universities are sites of academic excellence. In the hallowed halls of learning students meet with reverence and fervour to discuss the latest developments in their respective spheres of learning. In spite of all stereotypes to the contrary, traffic cones are utterly alien objects in the lives of scholars. And even if they appear to be drunk off their little tits you need to understand that the high they are experiencing is down to the heady quality of the pure facts they’re fiercely imbibing. Or at least that’s their line and they’re sticking to it.
The point is, universities are highly important institutions and would never look to make a fast buck off any poor unsuspecting millennial. The fact that they’ve hiked their fees up to three times where they were not that long ago is completely irrelevant. Think how lucky the students of today are in relative terms. If they were over in America then they’d be forking out sums in the hundreds of thousands rather than the paltry forty grand or so they’re saddled with now. And if they were in North Korea or similar? Forget about an education entirely. Probably. They almost definitely just get shoved in a hole somewhere or something.
And a prestigious place like Oxford would never ever go down the pointless add-ons route in order to maximise their takings. The Harry Potter experience where you shell out an extra five hundred quid for authentic robes is just a coincidence. For terribly low prices you can keep on trucking and add spell books, a magic wand, the most gorgeous snowy owl you’ve ever seen and someone will come round and carve a lightning bolt into your face. For authenticity and whatnot. Oxford would never try and tempt you to part with your hard earned money for a chance to snog famous alumni either. Definitely not going to happen.