Army Chiefs Warned PM Over Death Threat

There comes a point in life when schoolboy pranks aren’t really that funny anymore. Perhaps they’ve been rendered pathetic by your advanced age (this is of course during middle age. OAPs pulling stunts like these is adorably entertaining. Or so I have been led to believe by accounts of programmes such as Last of the Summer Wine. Which I may not have actually seen). Or the fact that you can’t find any better way to spend your time.

However, in one particular case it’s the fact that you do in fact have the clout to carry out the deed in question. It’s not all that amusing in this case. For David Cameron to go round telling people that he could have them killed comes off as petulant more than anything else if we’re being truly honest about the situation. But he really does refuse to be told.

The army chiefs calmly sat the man down when the information services flagged the situation. They explained that death threats ought to be used incredibly sparingly for the greatest effect. Frankly, he’s past the point in his career when an idle death threat can be easily brushed off. On the other hand, if he keeps issuing them left, right and centre then he’ll have to start having one or two recipients bumped off so that the rest of the world knows he means business.

What we know for sure is that he won’t be stopping any time soon. It’s a crying shame but there it is. Some people just have incredibly niche vices and habits. Other politicians might go for the glaringly pedestrian pursuits of hookers and cocaine or possibly particularly choice pornography. There are those who throw themselves headfirst into work and dare the rest of the world not to admit their state of being very close indeed to sainthood. For David it’s telling people how easily he could have them eliminated and seeing the fear in their eyes.

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