Parents Plan to Downsize English Revolution

Isn’t it frustrating when your announcement of carefully constructed and minutely detailed plans is met with a resounding silence? You thought that applause was a perfectly reasonable reaction. If not that (they’re ultimately rather reserved people after all. If everything you said was met with an adoring round of clapping they’d end up with some very sore hands) then at the very least some genuinely enthusiastic smiles.

You were certain that you were onto the biggest win of an idea seen this century. Or possibly last as well. Freeing the country from the yoke of tyranny was surely bound to be a crowd pleaser, right? At the front of the phalanx battling for emancipation would have been you. A glorious leader urging everyone forward and on towards being written into the pages of history.

Alright, any plan is going to have one or two bugs in it. This is why we have sounding boards prepared to listen to our ideas and brainstorm a solution or seven. Were they prepared to do anything along those lines? No, they didn’t have the patience to deal with your genius. Instead they wanted to stifle your brilliant creativity and make everything you wanted to do that little bit smaller and less impressive. It was never about your own supremacy. You were merely going to step into the role of emperor when asked to by your fellow revolutionaries very nicely indeed.

But no. The awesome power of Mum and Dad has decreed that the English Revolution is not to be. You’re not going to overthrow the government and disband the monarchy. You won’t even be a part of that process. It’s probably never actually going to happen. You know what though? That’s absolutely fine because you can work with your brand new constraints and run the hell out of that leaflet and poster campaign. They’ll even lend you a whole fiver to get you started.


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