P is for Planes Without Windows

As someone who very definitely enjoys flying this looks like a truly excellent idea. Yes, people who don’t enjoy the activity in the first place might become ever so slightly more uncomfortable and those with a genuine phobia of it may end up doing more than their fair share of increasingly panicked freaking out. On the other hand, welcome to the future people. If you somehow haven’t managed to stumble across this particular innovation in aeronautics (I can hardly imagine such a thing if I’m being truly honest. How can you not have as much time on your hands as I do to trawl the various nooks and crannies of the worldwide interweb for aggressively useless trivia?), allow me to enlighten you.

Having windows makes planes heavier. A way to make them lighter is to take the planes out. But a large proportion of the fun of taking to the skies in a metal tube with wings is being able to peer out and witness your voyage across the heavens. So taking the windows out would be the height of cruelty. It would be reducing passengers to the state of live cargo. I’m thoroughly shocked that Ryan Air hasn’t tried it yet. So the fix is to install massive screens and project footage from the outside of the plane.

So while this system will clearly be primed and ready for many a mishap (off the top of my head; ominous blue screen of death, accidental broadcast of hardcore pornography or, far more embarrassingly, the pilot’s practice video for his audition for X factor), when it works it will be wonderful. To be fair though, like an overexcited puppy, I still find flying incredibly thrilling. Maybe that’s just because I don’t get to do it very often. When I am an upper level management executive in charge of buttons (or something), I’m sure it will all be terribly passe and I’ll be more than ready for the screens to be installed to make life more interesting.

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