Why did they choose to call it Yahoo? Out of all the possible names floating out there in the ether of universe and the stuff that makes up people’s imaginations why would they pick that one? Google sounds like a nonsense word that couldn’t have possibly existed before (I’d have to Google it to know for sure. And if I did I’ve heard it will make the universe explode. Although that could just have been in that book I read called Lies to Tell Small Kids). Bing (which as far as I’m aware is pretty much only used by fictional people appearing on various sizes of screen. In no way does the sight of Andrew Garfield logging into Bing shatter the suspension of my disbelief. He’s totally Spiderman. Honest) at least sounds like a noise you’d expect when it pings through with your results.
And as for Jeeves, that dear old butler (or something) who settled down during his retirement to try and share his truly impressive knowledge with the rest of the world. Sure, it was a little cocky to attempt to elevate himself this way. More than that, it was a terribly risky move. The internet is asked all manner of horrific questions. But Jeeves is a renegade maverick who don’t have no time for fools, wasters and haters. Ask him if you don’t believe me.
But Yahoo? It’s something of an outdated exclamation of joy or excitement. It’s an alternative form of address for a barbarian or a philistine, a vulgarian or a lout. Essentially, a yahoo is a rude, noisy or violent person. Why on earth would you want such a hoodlum associated in any way shape or form with your groundbreaking internet search engine that no one in their right mind is ever going to use while Google is still in existence? Then again, there’s a good reason why no one’s ever put me in charge of naming things. Ask Jeeves if you don’t believe me.