M is for Madam

I’m still not entirely sure how I feel about being called madam. I haven’t really spent all that much time pondering the issue and I have no real idea what I’d prefer to be addressed as if I’m being completely honest. What are the alternatives in polite society? Sweetheart runs the risk all too often of becoming really rather patronising and Your Highness, Ruler of the Known and Eternal Empress of the Unknown Universe is just a tad too formal for everyday use (people have been calling me Rosalind quite a lot this week. As I’m sure I’ve said before, it’s handy to have a smart sounding version of my name to crack out on fancier occasions but I do find every now and again that I have to remind myself that it actually is my proper name).

So maybe an alternative manner of address isn’t the way forward. Maybe I should suck it up and accept that people are showing respect (probably because they want a tip. Who said that was cripplingly cynical? Get out. Right now, I refuse to have your negativity contaminating this beautiful pure white lily of a blog post. Alright, if you really want to you can stay but please stop speaking out of turn so often. I’ll have you know that you’re interrupting my highly delicate flow. That sounds pretty wrong. I’ll just move on) even if it makes me feel old.

At a couple of weeks shy of twenty two (I thought I’d put it out there so that you have time to buy me lots of presents. I like money. Just saying) I don’t think I should have to worry about my age for some time yet but I’ve always been relatively precocious (and a notorious liar). People should simply do as I do and avoid every method in speech of clarifying who it is you’re talking to. No misses, no sirs, not a name to be found. It keeps conversations interesting (I mentioned that I’m a terrible fibber right?).


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